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03 September 2009 @ 12:51 am
Blind Ambition Part 5/5: I Feel You in my Heart  
Title: Blind Ambition
Author: onehighhand
Rating: M
Subject: Make It of Break It - Tv Show
Pairing: Emily/Sasha
Summary: The stakes are high for every gymnast. Emily channels all her strength into her skill, leaving a part of her untouched by the world. Can her new coach teach her to trust, and in turn become the true gymnast she is?
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction that simply expands on the underlying sexual tension of the characters presented in the subject material.

Basking in the euphoria of coitus, Emily's mind was subdued with calming thoughts of her friend, coach and lover: Sasha Belov. Two naked bodies, still intertwined, lay in the glow of the moonlight, settling into a comfortable silence. Her mind wasn't on gymnastics or money or family. His wasn't on morality or ethics or reputation. They had both found a way to simply live in the moment, and enjoy what they had together. Emily's first time was everything it should have been: special, romantic and meaningful. Hours were passing with whispered words and subdued laughter. But each time she looked up at the clock, her mind started slipping back into reality. She wasn't just in bed with a lover. She was in bed with her coach. Her coach, for Christ's sake. This was shocking for a number of reasons, mainly of which being that Emily had never planned on losing it before she had gotten a gold medal. In all her years of gymnastics, Emily had never felt any remote attraction to a coach or any other man for that matter. Emily was not a girl to act on impulse. She thought out every move she made. She prided herself on her logic skills. In theory, Emily would never sleep with her coach.

But the reality of it was quite obviously completely opposite.

For the first time in a long time, Emily was feeling desired. She was feeling like a woman, cradled in the arms of a strong man who loved her.

That's where it all started to go wrong for her.

Images of her past started to flood her thoughts. Her mother's emotional and financial dependence on men and the always bitter outcome. Chloe would change from a strong independent woman to a frail shell of a human after Paul or Mark or Scott was done with her. This is how Emily knew men. They were life ruiners.

She had known this for years and years. She had been able to keep everyone out.

Except for the extremely naked man that she was now lying beside. He had cut through her shell, convinced her to trust.

And it had been worth it.

Reminding herself that he wasn't a Paul or a Mark or a Scott calmed her encroaching panic attack. He was just Sasha.

They finally said goodbye just before sunrise. Emily walked home in a quiet glow of the morning, finding herself skipping every once in a while. She snuck into her bedroom and dozed off for a few hours of sleep before morning training began.

Training the next day was both the worst and the best. She had never trained a full day on such little sleep and she was fighting exhaustion for 10 hours. The only thing that kept her running was the stolen smiles and winks between her and Sasha. His small readjustments of her body, on the beam or the mats, would make her skin burn with desire and memory of the night before.

He was igniting her. Setting her on fire. She had never performed with such raw strength or passion, or beauty and grace than she had on this day. Her face was never seen without a huge brimming smile.

Somehow she knew that this is what it felt like to be an Olympian: that Sasha, through his coaching, his teaching and his loving, had given her exactly what she needed to become the gymnast she truly was: trust.